Funny statuses about girls and boys, for social networks, are already a familiar element of our time. At the beginning, the users of the social networks composed them themselves, wanting to share their own mood, events, plans. Then, the funny, short and long statuses copied from the specialized sites became fashionable.
Today, many want to find an interesting status for their page. That’s why we’ve prepared this section that contains new funny statuses, full of comic remarks, humor and interesting cases. They will elevate the mood of the page owner and amuse all virtual friends, especially funny friendship statuses.
Funny social media statuses are a perfect form of communication.
We have prepared for you cool statuses for cheerful boys and girls, respectable men and beautiful women.
How often you do not have “friends” with a sense of humor is often difficult to find funny new statuses to suit your mood. For this purpose, we decided to gather a collection with the funniest statuses, corresponding to your mood.
In this article you will find a large number of the best humorous statuses, which are divided into paragraphs, for example funny love statuses for lovers or funny friendship statuses for those who want to cheer up their virtual friends.
You will definitely find what you are interested in and post it on your favorite social networks!
The funniest status for all occasions
Read the selection below carefully – who knows, maybe here you will find the funniest statuses for any occasion!
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๏ธ My mood is down, as is my phone and laptop battery. How can I charge it now ? My
fingers don’t fit.
โ
๏ธ Everyone wants peace, and I want ice cream.
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๏ธ Whether or not the black cat will bring you misfortune depends largely on who you are: a human being or a mouse.
โ
๏ธ Before, I wanted to go to work at least twice a month. Then they started transferring the salary to the cardโฆ
โ
๏ธ Some are like salt: it’s not sweet with them, but even without them it’s not tasty.
โ
๏ธ Human life is divided into 3 stages: 1. He still believes in Santa Claus. 2. Stop believing in Santa Claus. 3. He is Santa Claus himself.
โ
๏ธ There are people like drugs – you know it’s harmful, but it pulls you. And there are people like cake – sweet, tasty, but you get sick of them.
โ
๏ธ An Italian life, an American salary, a German car and a Hawaiian summer – that’s how little is needed for happiness.
โ
๏ธ In my life I have three addictions: from cigarettes, from the Internet and from you.
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๏ธ I’m not afraid to be a fool. I live around stupidity anyway.
โ
๏ธ I want money – boomerangs: to spend them and they come back.
โ
๏ธ I want to run and meet someone.
โ
๏ธ Without work, you will never leave the internet.
โ
๏ธ Smoking, wine, the impulses of passion, of course, shorten life, but they can prolong the moments of happiness.
โ
๏ธ If the glass broke – it’s lucky. If happiness collapses – it’s from the glass.
Funny status for girls, about relationships and friendship
You still don’t know what status to post
Here are some interesting ideas for funny status for girls.
๐ By the power of Instagram, I declare myself a model!
๐ God, I ask not for me, but for my mother: please send her a beautiful, intelligent and rich son-in-law!
๐ Talk to me from behind
Thanks for free PR!
Smile! Let the world guess what’s on your mind.
๐ I bought tea for weight loss. It’s really delicious with a cake!
๐ To the question of men: โhow are things on the personal frontโ, I would answer them: โmany of you have been killedโ.
๐ You don’t have the money to change your wardrobe – change your clothes! For new colleagues, all old clothes will be new.
๐ I wasn’t lucky with the boys. But time passed and I became wiser. Now the boys are out of luck with me.
No matter how bad people talk about me, I will always have something to add.
๐ When a star falls, you must be able to make a wish. 99% of the wishes sound like, “Wow, how beautiful!”
Look for reasons to smile
Then read these funny short statuses. They are only good for lifting moods, sketching a smile and making an impression on facebook and instagram.
Bune Good girls get to heaven, bad girls get where they want.
๐ If you are not yet in the story, then you have a fake magician by your side.
๐ One day you will meet him and you will be happy that nothing happened to the others.
๐ African girls do not bother in their dresses and wear a bush. And what, it’s not nice
๐ All the good guys – good night, all the bad guys – good evening.
๐ I wish all the girls to have a boyfriend! Why
not hang on to my boyfriend!
๐ 60% of boys expect the first step from girls. Success!
๐ I want a fragrance with the scent of happiness, mascara the color of joy and cream with a feeling of love!
๐ Never argue with a man, suddenly cry.
These are the funniest statuses, suitable for good mood and social networking.
๐ While putting on make-up in front of the mirror this morning, she fainted five times from her beauty.
๐ – You believe in love at first sight
– If it’s shoes, then I think so.
๐ If you had been more determined, we would have loved each other already!
๐ My boyfriend has only one disadvantage: he does not exist.
๐ Peace for the world, and for me – ice cream.
“Dad!” When he comes to ask for my hand, do not fall on his knees, do not say “you are our savior!”, But just nod calmly.
๐ I got to know him better and sent him away.
๐ I looked into those eyes again and whispered: You are the most precious thing in my life. He smiled. And he moved away from the mirror.
Funny love statuses
Look for funny love statuses
Then this list will impress you! We’ve added the best, especially for you, by carefully selecting each phrase in this collection of funny love statuses.
Funny love statuses are for romantic threads, who like to stand out. We know that modern romantics, who have also cultivated a sense of humor, would prefer to be inspired by such funny status about love.
Below you will find a selection of funny love statuses, funny boy statuses and funny girl statuses.
โค๏ธ Love is like a drug – you once thought of a person and wanted more. You thought again – and you became addicted!
โค๏ธ One day you will ask me what I love most – life or you
And I will answer you – the car. And you’re leaving without knowing that I still love chocolate with nuts and shows.
โค๏ธ True love is never without pain, thought the bunny hugging the hedgehog.
โค๏ธ If someone has set their eyes on your boyfriend, it means that someone has extra eyes.
โค๏ธ Eat, pray, love and share everything on Instagram.
โค๏ธ Cupidโฆ come here and I’ll give you an orange. You want two
Okay. Five
Okay, I’ll give you five, but the arrow is sure to reach the boy’s heart, okay
โค๏ธ If your boyfriend leaves you voluntarily, then, according to the law, he has to work for another two weeks until you find a new one.
โค๏ธ Love is not when it brings you a bouquet of roses and you smell them. Love is when you’re told all day about gas and you’re listening.
โค๏ธ Love is comingโฆ Love is leavingโฆ Love is comingโฆ Love is leavingโฆ I may not go
anymore โค๏ธ – Want a coffee
– I want to! – With sugar or lemon
– With you.
โค๏ธ No-no-no! I will not participate in your love triangle, there are already seven there!
โค๏ธ The most perfect couple is Adam and Eve, because she didn’t tell him about the former, and he didn’t tell her how delicious his mother cooks.
โค๏ธ To be in love means to put your boyfriend’s name in all the passwords. Love means having all the different passwords.
โค๏ธ Love is a medicine that is not forbidden, but it is very difficult to get the dose.
โค๏ธ I want to fall in love. I’m starting to look for the victimโฆ
โค๏ธ Distance increases the passionโฆ for someone else who is closer!
โค๏ธ Your eyes are the color of my happiness.
โค๏ธ What life would not teach us, the heart believes in miracles!
โค๏ธ I liked you and I liked you, but time did not coincide.
โค๏ธ Love is like a cup of hot coffee. You can warm up, but you can also burn.
โค๏ธ Love is eternal! Only partners change.
โค๏ธ There is nothing more useful in the household than a guilty husband.
โค๏ธ Love is like adidas – everyone has it, but not everyone has the original.
Funny statuses for boys
These funny status for boys can be restored in the conditions of your philosophy. Read them and have fun!
๐ It is said that you should throw a coin where you want to go back. I will definitely shake the whole wallet.
๐ Nothing limits actions like the phrase: “do what you want”!
“I’m sorry, but I already have a girlfriend.” -And if they offer you Lamborghini, you will say: “I’m sorry, but I already have a Dacia”
!
๐ Brunette – the best black line in your life!
๐ You will be ashamed of me, but happy!
๐ The alarm clock is wrong only in two cases – when it rings and when it does not ring.
There are some decisions that make my cockroaches clap their hands.
๐ If the world were a good place, we wouldn’t shout at birth.
๐ The most cruel torture of the end is the toothpaste tube.
๐ Even the most superstitious person will never give up the thirteenth salary!
Let your friends smile and appreciate your new and positive status.
๐ Chocolate is twice as delicious if it is hard to reach.
๐ Save your statuses – they will help your psychiatrist.
๐ I’m happy! Please don’t bother with the settings!
๐ Romanian scientists have come to the conclusion that most vitamins are found in pharmacies.
๐ According to statistics, the phrase: “What’s big!” it is most often heard by a spider.
๐ My memory is very bad. I can take revenge, then I forget. And I take revenge again.
๐ Good girls are bad girls who are not lit.
๐ Change A4 sheets on an Audi of the same model.
๐ Going by the fridge, it is impossible not to appreciate its design and the perfection of the inner world.
๐ Of all the Kamasutra, the most popular position is “Come tomorrow”.
Phones are getting thinner and smarter, and so are people.
I don’t care about money, but they reassure me.
๐ Dear money! I really miss you. I promise to buy you a new wallet. If you want to invite your relatives from Europe or America – I will not object. I will accept them all!
Funny statuses for Facebook
Funny Facebook statuses are a great way to communicate. Laugh and let your friends smile, appreciating your positive mood on the most popular online platform.
Funny Facebook statuses are a real joke. With their help, you can have fun not only you, but also all your virtual friends.
๐ค โโBy the power that Facebook has given me, I declare myself a model.
๐ค โโThe grandchildren of a 120-year-old grandmother got angry and took out a mortgage.
๐ค โโBut who am I to forbid anything
!
๐ค โโThe main thing in life is not to be lazy: you wanted to sleep – go to bed and sleep!
๐ค โโChildren want to be adults, adults – children, and I want to be me. What is the difference between being an adult or a child?
Anyway, something’s wrong!
๐ค โโAs soon as I find the keys to happiness, I change the padlock.
“Our meeting is not good,” said the neck of the ax.
๐ค โโIf you give up, then you live with what
And if you work, when to live
๐ค The more you think about life, the less you want to think about it.
๐ค โโEye for eye, tooth for tooth. Everything else is for money.
๐ค โโIt’s good where we’re not. If we’re there, we’re definitely going to ruin everything.
๐ค โโIf you feel deeply in love, sit down in a chair, take a deep breath, think. Maybe you just need sex
๐ค Yesterday I gave up. Today I do not remember where!
๐ค โโWhen you don’t have a plan of action, you can be scary with your improvisation.
Never forget those who have been with you during difficult times – Google, Wikipedia and Facebook!
Milioane Millions of people are afraid of me. Signed – dentist.
๐ค โโโCactusโ condoms – you will scream with pleasure!
I saw a guy in a store, elegantly dressed, with a gorgeous figure. But when I looked better, he was a mannequin!
I have learned to find a way out of the most complicated situations! It’s amazing how I find the entrance to them
๐ค I don’t know who writes the script of my life, but I see that he has a sense of humor.
Intelig Smart thoughts haunt me all the time, but I’m faster.
You remember the crazy dog โโin our yard
I bit him!
I saw my ex-girlfriend. Now I know for sure what to give him for his birthday – glasses!
๐ค โโFor some people I have special feelings, which can be expressed through pans, sockets or shovels.
๐ค โโIf this is love at first sight, then why look in your wallet
๐ค New diet: 3 days – only juices; 5 days – cereals only; 7 days – apples only. Then 9 daysโฆ Then 40 daysโฆ
๐ค You know when I woke up today
No, not when the alarm went off, not when I got out of bed and went to brush my teeth and not even when I- I’m dressed! My dream came true when I poured mayonnaise into tea!
๐ค โโThere is a legend that there are such women who, when they open the closet, know what they will wear.
The internet is like life: you have nothing to do but you don’t want to leave.
๐ค โโSince the probability of dying is 100% and the probability of dying from smoking is only 17%, I prefer to smoke.
Funny statuses about men
Look for funny statuses about men for social networks
Here you will find an interesting list of phrases that will make everyone smile.
Smile, because here you can find a whole treasure trove of funny status about men. Choose the best of these funny or long short statuses and cheer up your virtual friends.
โบ God, give me wisdom to understand men, give me love to forgive them, patience – to support their characters, but do not give me strength, because I will simply bring them down!
โบ They are drug-like people – you know it’s bad, but it attracts you. And there are people like a cake – sweet, tasty, but already full of them!
โบ Some men are like salt: it is not sweet with them, but it is not tasty without them.
โบ A free man is like a free place on the train – something is probably wrong with him.
โบ According to statistics, only 10 girls return: 2 gays, 3 alcoholics, 2 divorced, 3 drug addicts and 1 normal, but he is also married.
โบ Every girl needs a man to wipe her lipstick, not mascara.
โบ Sometimes, for a man to start acting, another man is needed.
โบ The best way to check a man’s loyalty is to ask him in the morning: “Do you want to go to yours or stay with me?
”
โบ If men knew what women were thinking, they would be 20 times bolder.
โบ The bad man is looking for girls. The good man is sought after by girls.
Funny status about women
We offer great status for cheerful and beautiful women. They are all so cool that they will help you interact easily with your virtual friends and loyal followers.
“My dear, we’re breaking up!” – Damn, the cockroaches in your head voted against me
again ๐ฉ I don’t have cockroaches in my head. They have long been killed by other creatures, larger and more dangerous.
๐ฉ The more precious a person is to us, the more delicious we will eat his brain.
Men are jealous when they love. Girls are jealous even when they don’t love.
๐ฉ In public transport, real men always sit with their eyes closed, because it hurts to see how girls look.
๐ฉ Lord, give me wisdom to understand men, give me love to forgive them, patience – to resist their characters. Just don’t give me the strength to beat them.
๐ฉ I am very kind, gentle and fluffy. The main thing is not to step on my tail.
๐ฉ If you know exactly who is to blame – don’t show up.
๐ฉ Wild sexy fantasy for the weekend – get enough sleep in all the pictures!
๐ฉ In this world, I am the queen. You don’t like it – live in another!
๐ฉ Anger is a condition in which the tongue and hands are faster than the brain.
๐ฉ Every girl in her life has to cry, stumble and fall. To cry happily, to stumble over money, and to fall into the arms of a loved one.
There are people with whom I want to share everything they have.
๐ฉ I have to call my mother to tell me where I am. – Hello, Mom. Where I am
๐ฉ Wind in my head, but ideas are always fresh.
Funny statuses in English
Am adunat ศi cรขteva statusuri amuzante รฎn englezฤ, despre dragoste ศi viaศฤ, despre bฤieศi ศi fete, care vฤ vor acoperi cu un val de pozitivism.
๐ Never run after a bus or a girl. There will always be another one.
๐ Two most honest people in this world, drunk people and little kids.
๐ You want to come in my life, the door is open. You want to get out of my life, the door is open. Just one request. Donโt stand at the door, you are blocking the traffic.
๐ Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
๐ About 90% of the high scores in mobile games are made either in the toilet or in a lecture or while preparing for exams.
๐ Not all man are fools, some stay bachelors.
๐ You are gonna need therapy after you meet me.
๐ I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
๐ I never look for trouble, it just always seems to find me.
๐ Everything is getting more expensive. Except for people, they are getting cheaper.
๐ If you really want to do something, youโll find a way. If you dont, youโll find an excuse.
๐ I am not scared of dying, I just donโt want to!
๐ Being 20 a man is a playboy, being 40 โ a playman, 60 โ play-off, ะฒ 80 โ game over.
๐ I donโt hate school. I just hate the teachers, the homework, the exams and waking up early in the morning.
๐ Better late than never, But better never late!
Funny Friendship Stats
Get your share of the smile with these funny friendship statuses and share your mood with others!
๐ฅ True friends are friends who will not let you do stupid things on your own.
I have beautiful friends. And to save this world – we just have to get together!
Friends are people who, before visiting you, ask you – “You have something to eat
”
๐ฅ If you helped a friend to solve his problems, he will surely remember when he will have problems again.
๐ฅ When my friends become businessmen, I will sell the unsuccessful pictures in my archives for a lot of money and I will buy a villa on the Cote d’Azur.
๐ฅ -When I die, bury me next to my friends. – Why – There’s no pit we couldn’t get out of!
The question is not why your friends are crazy. the question is why do you feel comfortable in a crazy gang
๐ฅ If my friend’s friend is my friend and my friend’s enemy is my enemy, then my girlfriend’s boyfriend is my boyfriend.
๐ฅ A friend is a newsletter, a liquor store, and a psychological support center.
๐ฅ A true friend is like a bra – close to my heart and always supports me!
๐ฅ True female friendship is when they do not have similar dresses.
๐ฅ Friends are like stars: sometimes they are not visible, but they are always there.
Only a true friend can say, “You annoy me,” without fear of offending you.
๐ฅ Friendship is when crazy ideas come from two heads at the same time.
๐ฅ As a child, my friends were not online, but in the yard. I was calling my friends not to walk on the phone, but I was shouting, “Get out.” We didn’t play network games, we hid and looked for each other. I didn’t have great phones, but they were diaries. It was a cool childhood.
Short and funny statuses on various topics
Short and funny statuses are a good creation. It is not for nothing that brevity is said to be the sister of talent. It is possible to say briefly, very accurately and funny about almost all existing topics.
I love and am loved, but don’t congratulate me – they are two different people.
I’m worried about you. You didn’t hit me hard when you fell in my eyes
๐ In short about me: character is unbearable, opinion is indestructible, behavior is inappropriate, love is unstoppable.
๐ This subscriber asks you to marry him. Answer: “Dear subscriber! Your account does not have sufficient funds for this operation. ”
๐ Mirror-mirror, calm down! It doesn’t complicate people.
๐ After sex, the teacher never feels good, but satisfied.
๐ When I eat, I am deaf and dumb. When I drink, I am much more sociable.
๐ The scariest person is the stateless person. You don’t know what nonsense he has in his head.
I want to know my happiness. The meeting place is still available.
๐ Serious girls are like serious sites. Registration is required for additional functions.
๐ Chefs work on the principle: Interesting, but that’s what they’ll eat
!
๐ Let’s drink for Santa Claus: as far as I can remember, he doesn’t get sick, he doesn’t get old and he always has money for presents!
๐ – Honey, which women do you like best: smart or beautiful
– Neither one nor the other. You just know, my dear, that I only love you.
๐ How to drive a girl crazy
Give her a ton of money and close all the shops!
Attention! Special offer! Come visit three times for no reason and you will receive a free blacklist ticket.
Funny statuses in Englishย
There can be a whole philosophy in every status. But what is the philosophy in the funny statutes in English
You will find the answer in the translations below.
Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life. (Happiness is not a goal, but a way of life)
๐ป The spaces between your fingers were created so that others could fill them in. (The spaces between the fingers were created so that someone could fill them)
๐ป Not all men are annoying me. Some are dead. (Not all people annoy me. Some are already dead)
๐ป Be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it. (Pay attention to what you want, you might get it)
๐ป I reject your reality and substitute my own! (I reject your reality and replace it with mine)
๐ป Nobody`sa virgin. Life screws us all. (No one will remain a virgin. Life will have us all)
๐ป Follow your dreams. Unless it’s a personโฆ apparently they call that stalking. (Follow your dream. Unless it’s a person, otherwise it can be called persecution)
๐ป I’m looking for a girlfriend that likes me for my money, but is really bad at math. (I’m looking for a girl who loves me for my money, but who isn’t strong in math)
๐ป When a girl says she’ll be ready in 5 more minutes, it’s the same as when a guy says the game has 5 minutes left . (When a girl says she’s ready in 5 minutes, it’s the same as when a boy says there’s 5 minutes left until the end of the match)
๐ป When a woman says ยซwhat
ยปIt’s not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said. (When a woman says “what
“, it doesn’t mean she didn’t hear you. It only gives you a chance to say something else)
๐ป The heart is a terrible GPS. (My heart is a terrible navigator)
๐ป Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; but I am not sure about the universe. (Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; but I’m not sure about the universe)
๐ป Crazy is like diarrhea. You can only hold it in for so long. (Madness is like diarrhea. You can hold it, but not for long)
๐ป Alcohol. Because no good story started with someone eating a salad. (Alcohol. Because no interesting story started when someone ate a salad)
๐ป I always learn from the mistake of others who take my advice. (I always learned from the mistakes of those who followed my advice)
