Children love to laugh, and a laugh or a smile can easily be provoked by funny jokes for children. Whether you’re telling jokes for 5-year-olds or 11-year-olds, they’ll find them very funny and moody.
We have put together the funniest children’s jokes that charge positively and will make your little ones smile wide.
In fact, some dry children’s jokes are also selected, which can be liked by people of any age and which cannot be found in any children’s joke book.
Jokes with school for children
School benches are the most popular among children aged 10-12. This is natural, since school for children is the second home in which they spend a lot of time.
We present you the funniest jokes about school, about teachers and colleagues, but also jokes with Bubble at school for children.
😄 The teacher asks the student: -Bubble, which is your favorite object
😄 The teacher says to the student: – Bubble! If you bring such notes, your father will have gray hair. Bubble: “Teacher, it’s already late.” Dad has been bald for a long time.
😄 Mom: -Bubble, why is your diary in the corner
-Mom, I punished her for a bad deed!
😄 The teacher asks the student: -What will you become when you grow up
-A bricklayer to build a house without corners!
😄 Math lesson. The teacher says, “Now I’m going to prove Pythagoras’ theorem to you!” The student from behind: -No, teacher. We believe you!
😄 The teacher talks to the student on the phone: “Why didn’t you come to school today
” -I have a temperature of 42! “It can’t be that way!” – Yes! Mom said 36 and 6!
😄 Teacher to student: – Why your topic seems to be written by your father It looks like his
handwriting! The student: – Because I used his pen!
😄 -Bubble, don’t come to school tomorrow without your parents! – But the day after tomorrow
😄 After checking the dictation, the teacher handed the students the notebooks. Bula asks, “I’m sorry, I don’t understand what’s written below.” -I wrote: “Write more clearly!”
😄 Alina comes to her mother after school: – Mom, do you remember what you promised me yesterday
? If I have 10 in math, I can go out in the yard all day
– I remember. “Well, I can only go out for half a day today!”
😄 – Mihăiță, how do you feel at school
– Very good, mommy! I’m not bored at all. – How so
– Every hour the teacher makes me sit in another corner of the classroom.
The father is called to school: – Your son drew a very real fly on the bench, and I crushed my fist trying to kill her. – Ha! Having seen me, when I went into the bathroom and saw a painted crocodile in the bathtub, I was afraid to go out through a painted door.
😄 The teacher wrote in the student’s notebook: – “Liliana talks too much”. The father, signing the acknowledgment note, adds: – “If you knew his mother…”
😄 A child was crying in the hallway. The teacher sees him. – Baby, why are you crying
– A child stole my pie! – It was on purpose
. – No, with cheese.
😄 The wife leaves for the delegation, in the interest of the job. The husband wakes the baby in the morning, prepares his breakfast and takes him by the hand to take him to kindergarten. In kindergarten, the teacher tells her that this child is unknown to her. It takes him to a second kindergarten and a third. When I leave the fourth kindergarten, the child says to him: – Daddy, another kindergarten and I’m even late for school today.
His mother enters Răducu’s bedroom to wake him up to go to school, but finds him crying. – Son, why are you crying
? “I dreamed the school had caught fire.” My mother tries to comfort him. “Stop crying, my dear. It was just a dream.” “That’s why I’m crying!”
Teacher: – Bubble, what are the names of the people who keep talking to others, although it is clear that in the end they are no longer interested in the discussion
Bubble: – They are called teachers, ma’am.
😄 My mother talks to Bulă: – Son, I bought your textbooks for school, they were expensive, so take care of them! – Okay, Mom, I don’t even touch them!
😄 – Grandpa, we have a meeting with my parents tomorrow. You can end up
– why do you always call me at the meeting
– because you don’t hear so well.
😄 Math teacher, talking to the 3 correcting students: – Math does not enter your head at all. If you want to pass the class, do a good deed this week. One week passes: – Let’s see, what a good deed you did last week,
the teacher asks the first proofreader. “Professor, I helped an old woman cross the street!” – Sounds good. You
ask the second corrector. “I helped an old woman cross the street, too!” – What a coincidence. Okay, and you
ask the third proofreader. “I helped an old woman cross the street, too!” – That’s too much, so all three of you helped an old woman cross the street.
– Not an old woman at all, Professor! The same old woman! “How the same old woman
wasn’t one to help her.”
– All three of us barely made it, because he didn’t want to cross the street!
😄 -Teacher, know that my son can’t come to school today! -But who am I talking to
-With my father!
😄 Discussion between father and son: – You know that I use PC, tablet, MP3, smartphone. What you used to do at school in your day
! the curious son asks. – The mind!
Animal jokes for children
Equally popular are children’s animal jokes. 7-9 year olds love to laugh at the naivety and embarrassment of cute little animals. Here are some examples, where animals are the main characters:
🔔 -Bubble, name the laziest animal! “The snake!” – Why
– Because he lies down, goes to bed, even eats lying down!
🔔 A horse and a zebra meet, the horse says: – What cool pajamas! I want one too! Where did you buy it from
? ”“ Mom, I saw a mouse fall into the milk carton! – You took him out, son
– No, I threw the cat in there!
🔔 Bubble in the country. One day, the nephew looks at his grandmother watering the cow and says, “That’s how milk is diluted with water!”
🔔 There are 2 hedgehogs. One asks, “Why did you bandage your hand?”
– I scratched her back yesterday.
🔔 Mother: – Son, you changed the water for fish
– Mother, yes, but they haven’t drunk it yet.
🔔 The mother says: – The animals are with tails and without tails. The little boy: – And there’s a snake. This is a tail without an animal.
🔔 The kitten licks the baby’s hands. The child says loudly to his mother, “Probably our cat needs to be fed.” He’s already tried me!
🔔 Two fleas won the LOTTO.
– One of them asks you what you are going to do with the money you earn . – First of all, I’m buying a dog just for me.
A cat approaches an aquarium and looks greedily at the fish inside. He stretches out his paw to catch the fish. He sees him and, very frightened, shouts: – Harness, harness! Then he starts growling just like a dog. The cat gets scared and runs away. The little fish muttered happily, “It’s a good thing I learned a foreign language!”
“Bubble to the psychologist
🔔 Before the battle of Vaslui, Ștefan cel Mare appears in front of the soldiers on a cow.
🔔 An older man asks him: – Where is your horse, Maria-Ta
– The English ate it!
Tip A guy knocks on the door of a house. A dog gets to his feet and says, “The owner is not home!” The guy fainted with fear. When he recovers, he asks the dog:
🔔 – Well, if you’re a dog, why don’t you bark
– I didn’t mean to scare you!
🔔 A bear, a lion and a pig met and boasted:
🔔 The bear: – If I howl once in the forest, all the animals tremble with fear.
🔔 Leo: – If I roar once in the jungle, all the animals are terrified.
🔔 Pig: – That’s nothing, I sneeze once and the whole planet gets vaccinated!
🔔 The lion cub to his father: – Daddy, it is true that you are the king of animals
– When your mother is not around, yes.
🔔 Two camels, father and son, talk to each other: -Dad, why do we have a hump
-Well, there are no wells in the desert and we keep our water supply in them. -But why do we have such big hooves
-There’s a lot of sand in the desert, and they help us walk. -When we were looking for him at the Zoo
🔔 A dog was running through the desert in bigger and bigger circles. A camel, seeing him, says to him: – What happened to you, puppy
– If I can’t find a tree quickly, I’ll do it!
- To the vet: – Doctor, my dog has no nose! – And how it smells
- After the first flight out of the closet, the little moth is asked by his mother: – How was it
– Okay, people were enjoying me, everyone was applauding.
- A frightened mouse shouted at another, “Watch out!” A black cat is coming. The other calmly replies, “Don’t worry, I’m not superstitious.”
- In a pet store: – Somehow you have some small sharks for sale. The
seller, surprised, answers: – No, but what will you need
? the fish in the aquarium.
- Between the kangaroos: – Where’s your baby, darling
– Imagine, darling, that I fell victim to a pickpocket!
- A mouse and a cat are standing in line at a confectionery. The waitress asks the mouse: – What do you want
– A cream cake, please! – And you, Mr. Cat
. – I just want the cream. – I’ll put it on your plate
. – No, put it directly on the mouse!
Individ An individual enters the clock with a puppy in his arms. – Hello. I came for the dog. – For the dog
Here watches are repaired. What can I do for her?
What she has
– She stops every ten minutes.
🔔 Mother to child: – See that baby.
He found a worm and shared it half with his brother. “But I would do the same if it were a worm!”
New children’s jokes
Children’s jokes provoke sincere laughter even in adults. We suggest you read these new jokes for children, which will be appreciated by adults as well.
↩️ – Okay, son, you stopped crying! – I haven’t stopped, I’m resting!
↩️ -Bubble, you didn’t get sick by accident, why are you so pale today
– the educator asks. -No, only my mother washed me today!
↩️ A little girl looks at a pregnant woman and asks: – What do you have
– pointing her finger at her belly. – Child. -You love him
– Yes, very much. -Why did you eat it then
↩️ Little Bubble used to see his mother only in jeans, but then suddenly his mother put on his dress. Bubble asks surprisingly: – Mom, you’re a girl
↩️ – Boy, what do you want to become when you grow up
– Sailor! – You know how to swim
– But what, there are no ships left!
↩️ The boy watches as his father paints the ceiling, and the mother says: -Look and learn, son, you will grow up and you will help your father! The boy: – Do you think she won’t finish it by then
↩️ Grandma offers her grandson to read a bedtime story. He refuses and says, “I don’t want to.” All stories end the same way – with snoring.
↩️ The daughter asks her mother: – You can ask a person if she did nothing
– Of course you can’t, daughter. – I didn’t do my homework.
↩️ The son hands his father a drawing with his portrait. Dad examines the drawing and asks, “Son, why do I have yellow hair
?” “I’m sorry, Dad.” I couldn’t find the paint bald!
↩️ Bulă, having no education, decides to make a farm. In the first month he buys 100 chicks, in the second month he buys another 100 and so on for a year. After a year, he meets Ștrulă: – How is your farm, Bulă
asked Ștrulă. – Bad, Strula, bad! – Yes, why
– Well, I don’t have any more chickens! “How so
!” – I don’t know, me. I think I’m doing something wrong. Either I plant them too deep or I don’t water them enough.
↩️ Little Alina reads a biology textbook and asks her grandmother: – Grandma, you can have children
– Of course not! – Grandma, then you’re a man!
↩️ Mom asks her little son: – Honey, why are you brushing your teeth for the seventh time
– Mommy! That’s to leave me alone for a whole week.
↩️ – Grandma, what’s the name of this berry?
– Blackcurrant. – But why is it red
? – Because it’s still green.
↩️ -If your tooth hurts we need to go to a dentist. I hope you’re not afraid. – No, Daddy. -That’s how I want you, brave. Know that the dentist does nothing for you! -If that’s the case, what’s the point of bothering him
The teacher asks Mariuca in kindergarten
: , that he has no more.
↩️ – Grandpa, God made you
– Yes, my dear, God made me, Grandpa answers. A few minutes later, the little girl asks her grandfather again, “Grandpa, but God made me
.” “Yes, my dear,” replied the grandfather.
↩️ For a few minutes, the little girl studies her grandfather, and then looks at her reflection in the mirror. Her grandfather wondered what was going through her mind. At last the little girl says:
↩️ – You know something, Grandpa
God has been doing a better job lately.
↩️ The bald father, the little girl asks her mother: – Mother, why is the father so bald
– Because he has a lot of mind and his hair has fallen out, the mother answers. – But why do you have so much hair on your head
– Eat and shut up!
↩️ A mother bought her son a Halloween costume to scare his friends. – Mom, I should take out the price tag, no
– No, leave him alone, let’s scare your dad too!
↩️ Question on a radio station: – How can I teach my child what VAT means
- Answer: – Eating a quarter of her ice cream.
- Dad, you can write in the dark
– Let’s try! – Okay Dad, I turned off the light, now sign my notebook.
- A very talented young footballer asks the club owner: – How high will my salary be
– At first 10,000 euros per month, and later higher. – Okay, then I’ll come later.
- His grandfather and nephew were talking. The nephew says: – I have a lot of friends on Facebook that I have never met! Grandpa replies, “In my day, I called them imaginary friends.”
- A boy wants to conquer a girl: – Somehow he calls you “Google
” – No, why does the
girl ask angrily. – Because you have everything I’m looking for. “Your name is YahooAnswers
.” “No, why does the
boy ask angrily?” “Because you’re asking bad questions.”
- In the operating room, the surgeon to the assistant: – Anesthesia. – Ours or import
– Import. – The import is over. “Then ours.” – Nani, nani
- A dwarf enters a pharmacy and asks for an aspirin. The pharmacist asks him: – Let me pack
you – No, thank you. The sound of rolling.
↩️ – You are sentenced to 10 years in prison. Would you like to add something else
– Woe to me, Judge, I’d rather go down!
↩️ A dad with a little boy at the movies watching a movie with Indians. – Why are you painting your face, Daddy
? – They’re preparing for war, son. One morning: “Daddy, Daddy, let’s pack our bags and leave quickly!” – Why
– Because my mother is preparing for war!
↩️ It was Paul’s father’s birthday. Her father said, “The best gift you can give me is to be the first in the class.” “Too late, Dad, I bought you a tie!”
↩️ Bubble asks his father: -Dad, the day why don’t stars appear in the sky The
father answers: -I don’t know. -Well, why didn’t you ask when you were a kid?
↩️ A grandfather tells his nephew: – One day I was on a ship on the Nile, in Egypt, and I was looking quietly at the pyramids, when I was attacked by twenty-five huge crocodiles. I proved them all! “But, Grandpa, you told me this story last year, too, and there were only ten crocodiles!” “Well, you were too young to know the truth!”
↩️ A little girl was sitting next to her mother and studying her. At one point, he noticed how many white hairs he had on his head and asked her why. His mother replied, “Every time you upset me, or do something bad, and I’m unhappy, I get a white thread.” After a few moments of deep thought, the little girl replied, “So that’s how Grandma got all her white hair.”
↩️ Mom got to the 3rd lullaby. But the child continues to turn in bed. At the 4th song he bursts out: – Mom, do you sing more or let me sleep
↩️ -The gold exposed in the open air undergoes any change
-Yes, Professor. -Really! Namely
– A change of ownership.
↩️ -Gigel, tell me the longest word that comes to mind. -Gum. -How so
It has only two syllables. -Yes, but we can prolong it as long as we want!
Short jokes for children
These short jokes for children consist of one or two sentences with an unexpected result. They are very well perceived by puppies of all ages. Here are the most interesting:
✅️ – Mom, Mom, I cooked porridge! – Daughter, from what you cooked it
– From sarmale!
✅️ The ball was still flying towards the principal’s window, and the children were already playing hide-and-seek.
✅️ -Why our fridge is so agitated, it’s frozen
✅️ Now on TV all the shows are marked by the age limit, and the kids know exactly which shows are the most interesting.
✅️ Bulă liked to feed the pigeons in the yard and add multicolored paint to the feed. So all the cars in the yard have become much brighter!
✅️ If in the fall the roof of the house will be greased with condensed milk, then in the spring it will be much more pleasant to suck the icing.
✅️ Daddy, why did you marry your mother
– See, not even the baby understands why.
- – Why the crow squeaks when it flies
– Change gears.
- – Kids, what does it mean to be a diplomat
? – Think twice before saying anything!
- Why Cats Are Good At Video Games
Because They Have Nine Lives.
- Who is stronger, an elephant or a snail
A snail, because it carries its whole house on its back, the elephant only carries its trunk.
- Why did the farmer take a brown cow
because he wanted to get milk with chocolate.
- The child of an internet maniac asks his father: – Daddy, why do we have five fingers on our hand if the mouse has only two buttons
- What is black and white and lives in the Sahara
A stray penguin!
- My mother won’t let me keep the dog in the house! – But your father
– Leave him.
- Why don’t elephants eat polenta
? Because no one gives them.
- – Why we speak our mother tongue and not our mother tongue
– Because my mother speaks the most at home.
- What did the number 0 say to the number 8
– Beautiful belt!
- Dad, I can watch TV
– Watch it quietly, just don’t turn it on.
✅️ – You came to the tank, Grandma! (said the little boy, opening the door for him). Dad said you were the only one missing!
✅️ What is the first thing a king or queen does when he comes to the throne
✅️ Doctor, I have a problem: people don’t pay much attention to me… – Next!
✅️ What a computer science teacher shouts when he drowns
– F1, F1, F1!
✅️ At a fish restaurant: – Serve mollusks
– We serve all customers.
✅️ Parent: What do elves learn at school
Child: The elf-bet!
✅️ How do you know carrots are good for eyesight
because no bunny wears glasses?
✅️ – Matei, on which shelf of your library did you put the math collections
“On the shelf of horror books.”
✅️ The top of the tram: let the police pull it to the right.
✅️ – Great! I would like to fly to the moon during my theses! – Why
– There any subject is 6 times lighter.
✅️ What the hurricane tornado told him
I’m watching you!
✅️ What is the name of the parrot’s wife
- Why does the rhino have horns
because he couldn’t find bread?
- Why did the two burgers in the fridge feel bad
because they had seen the salad dressing.
- I would like to be a millionaire, like my father! – Wow, your dad is a millionaire
– No, he wants to be a millionaire too!
- – Why were you running through the bed
– To catch the sleep I lost yesterday!
- – Children, what are the phenomena of nature in winter
- Two ghosts were talking: – Listen, you believe in people
- Why puppies don’t know how to dance
Because they have two left legs.
- A dog brags to a cat that he knows a word in another language. Cat: Yes,
tell him. The dog: Meow!
✅️ What a cat becomes after 3 days
A four day cat.
✅️ What one flea says to another flea
We walk or take a dog