Funny Coffee Quotes that Keep the Laughs Brewing

Coffee is the lifeblood of many across the world. Whether you’re an early riser or night owl, there’s always time for a delicious cup of joe. We have been lucky enough to enjoy coffee for centuries, and much of that joy comes from lighthearted coffee quotes to celebrate this comforting beverage. If you’re looking for funny coffee quotes to get your day started, here is a compilation of funny coffee quotes to keep the laughs brewing.

Funny Coffee Quotes from Authors, Actors, and Artists

The process of creativity cannot happen without a little bit of caffeine. Here are coffee quotes from authors, actors, and artists that will make you smile:

• “Coffee is a language in itself.” – Jackie Chan

• “I never laugh until I’ve had my coffee.” – Clark Gable

• “I like my coffee with cream and my literature with optimism.” – Abigail Reynolds

• “Beer is made by men, wine by God, but coffee by the Devil.” – Anonymous

• “A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.” – Paul Erdos

• “A morning without coffee is like sleep.” – Anonymous

Funny Coffee Quotes from Philosophers and Historical Figures

The wisdom of philosophers and historical figures is not complete without a little bit of humor. Here are some funny coffee quotes from philosophers and historical figures:

• “Coffee is a way of stealing time that should by rights belong to your older self.” – Terry Pratchett

• “I would rather suffer with coffee than be senseless.” – Napoleon Bonaparte

• “Black as the devil, hot as hell, pure as an angel, sweet as love.” – Charles Maurice de Talleyrand, speaking of coffee

• “The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportional to the quantity of coffee he drank.” – Sir James Mackintosh

• “I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.” – T.S. Eliot

• “Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world.”– Thomas Jefferson

• “Not all those who wander are lost–sometimes they’re just looking for good coffee.” – J.R.R. Tolkien

Funny Coffee Quotes from Pop Culture

You don’t have to go to the library to find funny coffee quotes. Pop culture has blessed us with plenty of hilarious verses about the almighty caffeinated goodness of this beloved drink. Here are some funny coffee quotes from pop culture:

• “It’s not what I need right now, it’s what I deserve.” – Chandler Bing

• “I just wanna make out and drink coffee.” – Leslie Knope

• “When a man is tired of coffee, he’s tired of life.” – Jules Munshin

• “Coffee is a hug in a mug.” – Unknown

• “Coffee: the favourite drink of the civilized world.” – Thomas Jefferson

• “Without my morning coffee I’m just like a dried up piece of roast goat.” – Johann Sebastian Bach

• “Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death, and sweet as love.” – Turkish Proverb

Funny Coffee Quotes from the Internet

The many funny coffee quotes on the internet demonstrate the pervasiveness of coffee culture across all generations. Here are few funny coffee quotes from the internet:

• “I don’t like coconut, but I’ve been drinking it in my coffee for years to fit in.” – Unknown

• “Coffee: because adulting is hard.” – Unknown

• “Decaf? Nope, if I wanted a watered-down version of something I’d ask for a different career.” – Unknown

• “When life gives you lemons, add coffee.” – Unknown

• “I don’t have a problem with caffeine; I have a problem without it.” – Unknown

• “I’m not lazy, I’m just on my energy-saving mode.” – Unknown

• “Coffee! Because Mondays were made for complaining.” – Unknown

Funny Coffee Quotes from Quotes and Proverbs

Famous quotes and proverbs are memorable and filled with wit. Here are some funny coffee quotes from quotes and proverbs:

• “Coffee makes us severe, and grave, and philosophical.” – Jonathan Swift

• “Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world”– Thomas Jefferson

• “Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.” – Anne Morrow Lindbergh

• “Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.” – Alphonse Allais

• “Life is short, stay awake for it.” – Unknown

• “A Cup of Coffee – A Vice of Riches” – Unknown

• “Life begins after coffee.” – Unknown

The holidays are nearly here and, rather than stress and worry, take some time to appreciate the season’s finer things—especially coffee! After all, laughter is the best medicine, and there is nothing like humor to lift our spirits. The next time you reach for that cup of coffee, take pause for a chuckle and share some of these funny quotes with friends, family, and colleagues.

Here are a few funny coffee quotes for the holiday season:

• “I like my coffee like I like my money—dark and hot.” – Unknown

• “Coffee, chocolate, men. Some things are better rich.” – Unknown

• “Coffee: Becaus Santa Needs More than Milk and Cookies.” – Unknown

• “Coffee: because you can’t hug everyone.” – Unknown

• “When Christmas spirit is low, brew some coffee and get going.” – Unknown

• “Christmas morning with a big cup of coffee. Best gift ever.” – Unknown

• “The holidays are near. Proceed with coffee.” – Unknown

Whether you are an early bird or night owl, coffee does not discriminate. Invoke the power of laughter each time you take pause for a memorable cup of joe, and it might just be the jolt of inspiration you need. So spread joy and kindness with a funny coffee quote and get the laughs brewing!